Marital Milestone

             “Did you think 35 years ago we would be running to the beach in Florida, looking and feeling our best, and training for a half marathon?”  He asked.  She tried to catch her breath from running hard and laughed at the same time, “I didn’t think we’d even be together 35 years much less taking a run to the beach.”  As they look back on the years of marriage they still smile at one another, hold hands, and are in complete awe of each other.  In today’s society, the divorce rate is above 50% and climbing every year.  Couples don’t stay married past 5-7 years. When a couple celebrates a milestone like 35 years it’s a big deal!

Kevin asked me the question, “Did you think we’d be here 35 years ago?”  Honestly, I thought we’d be another divorce statistic.  Our marriage didn’t start out on the right foot.  I will spare the details of that in this blog post and leave it for another time, it’s quite lengthy and complicated.  I laugh every time I see a relationship status of “It’s complicated” in Facebook, because all relationships and marriages are complicated.  How do couples stay married for 35 years?  How did Kevin and I stay married for 35 years and why?  The odds were so against us.

I couldn’t be happier to have stuck out all the hard times, the painful times, the disappointments. All of our trials shaped me and us for who we are today.  On July 3, 1982, we had no clue what we were getting into, nor did we know what we were supposed to do as a married couple.  All we knew was we had this connection, and a strong attraction. We wanted to spend the rest of our lives together.  Marriage doesn’t come with a how to hand book.  Marriage doesn’t come with a how to love your spouse handbook either.  Everyone’s vision of love and marriage are quite different.  Love and marriage is a lifelong process we get to do together.  Doing it together is how couples make “milestone marriages.”  Couples understand the trials and tribulations that come with the territory of marriage.  A good marriage is one that says, “Did you think we’d be where we are today back when we got married?”  A good marriage is a strong connection to another human being and also says, “I love you more now.”  Love and marriage grow over time and it’s worth every mistake, hurt, and pain.  When you can look back at all the blood, sweat, and tears and you’ve made it another year that’s a good marriage.  Happy 35th Anniversary to you Kevin, I couldn’t imagine life without you!